Confession..

[ejean9]

Irish Boy's Confession

'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'.

The priest asks, 'Is that you, Dicky?'

'Yes, Father, it is.'

'And who was the girl you were with?'

'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.'

'Well, Dicky, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now.
Was it Mary Walsh?'

'I cannot say.' 'Was it Teresa Brown?'

'I'll never tell.'

'Was it Margaret Doyle?'

'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'

'Was it Anne O' Neil?'

'My lips are sealed.'

'Was it Catherine O' Tool, then?'

'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'

The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped Dicky, and I admire that.
But you've sinned and have to atone.

Your punishment is that you cannot be an altar boy now for four months.
Now you go and behave yourself.'

Dicky walks back to his pew, and his friend Tommy slides over and whispers, 'What'd you get?'

"Four Months holiday and five good leads".

[victorfrank]

Brilliant, Jean, brilliant.

[PATRIOT73]

[Huddylion]

Pmsl

[canuckbid]

Funny stuff! I just got my xray back from the doc and now I know why I'm having so many problems doing anything!

[PATRIOT73]

A man boarded an aircraft at London and took his seat; as he settled in he noticed a very beautiful woman boarding the plane. He realized she was heading straight towards his seat and bingo! she took the seat right beside him.

Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, 'business trip or vacation?'

She turned, smiled enchantingly and said 'Business. I'm going to the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States'.

He swallowed hard, here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for nymphomaniacs! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, 'What's your business role at this convention?'

'Lecturer,' she responded.. 'I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.'

'Really', he smiled, 'what myths are those?'

'Well,' she explained, ' one popular myth is that African American men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Greek descent. We have also found that the best potential lovers in all categories are the Irish,'

Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed. 'I'm sorry,' she said, 'I really shouldn't be discussing this with you, I don't even know your name.'

'Tonto,' the man said.... 'Tonto Papadopoulos , but my friends call me Paddy

[ejean9]

Rofl Jay...good one

[youmeus]

A man boarded an aircraft at London and took his seat; as he settled in he noticed a very beautiful woman boarding the plane. He realized she was heading straight towards his seat and bingo! she took the seat right beside him.

Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, 'business trip or vacation?'

She turned, smiled enchantingly and said 'Business. I'm going to the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States'.

He swallowed hard, here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for nymphomaniacs! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, 'What's your business role at this convention?'

'Lecturer,' she responded.. 'I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.'

'Really', he smiled, 'what myths are those?'

'Well,' she explained, ' one popular myth is that African American men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Greek descent. We have also found that the best potential lovers in all categories are the Irish,'

Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed. 'I'm sorry,' she said, 'I really shouldn't be discussing this with you, I don't even know your name.'

'Tonto,' the man said.... 'Tonto Papadopoulos , but my friends call me Paddy

You type English beautifully!

[DanTheMan3]

Bet you would not understand it if it was in their usual dialect.
.

[youmeus]

If you are talking to me you are correct!