Amusing drunken stories

[cutpricegoodies]

I heard one today, a friend of a friend moved 150 gnomes from one garden to another whilst coming home from the pub one night. Must have take hours.

[chiquita]

Someone I know, (very well!) decided he couldn't wait to get in from the pub, and proceeded to pee while walking by a hedge. Imagine his surprise when he reached the end of the hedge and saw two police officers stooped down at the end! Apparently they were staking out a stolen car that had been dumped up our road! Exit one red-faced pee-er!!

[chiquita]

Then there was the time when I decided to move the furniture around while the OH was off at the pub. Hours later, he came in the worse for wear, walked into the settee and toppled over it....on top of me! I was NOT amused!

[fairywishes]

told this one before, so im not fussed any more.

Years ago ....... early 90s , was a bit of a pi** head. One drunken stagger to a taxi ( with friends ) i insisted they drop me home 1st.
They where not having it ( rightly so as i lived further away ) anyway, DRUNK AS A SKUNK i protested and in the end i said if you dont take me 1st im getting out. & did.

Got out the taxi, whilst it was driving

tumbled down the road at about 30 mph

Looked like Patsy from abfab when she wakes up after the fire.

One side all torn and filthy where id hit the road ( over n over ) ffs. lol

Anyway ... was a source of great amusement for my cousin who was babysitting when i staggared in 3am ish , looking like a pure c***!


ps : only thing broken was bottle of perfume and mirror , from my handbag and heel off one shoe, if my memory serves me - and i was well slim in them days lol , not even 1 broken bone.

[mogmog2005]

I woke up one morning after a major mudshake binge and my purse was in the fridge - still remains an unsolved mystery as to why i put it there...