Daily Diary of pets

[ejean9]

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary......
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10.00 am – Got a drink of water! My favourite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary...

Day 983 of my captivity...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. B******.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now .....

[PATRIOT73]

Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

thats 5bobz
even the bugga as 2 beds
2 massive bed lounger cushiony things

[ejean9]

lol..and it sounds exactly like my cats..weaving in and out my legs !

[PATRIOT73]

lol..and it sounds exactly like my cats..weaving in and out my legs !

5bobz luvs cats

[Armstrongs]

Not such a favourite thing for my dawg today

Booked him into the groomers for a "short, back and all off"



Yvonne x

[DanTheMan3]

Not such a favourite thing for my dawg today

Booked him into the groomers for a "short, back and all off"



Yvonne x

My pet is the wife.

Do you think she would appreciate this?

[shezz]

think my dogs favourite thing is to follow me
if I
Go to the washing line, they follow
go into the kitchen, they follow
go to the loo, come out and they are sitting by the door waitng for me
go on the treadmill they come and lay down by it
when i sit down they come and lay down by my feet
when my son comes into the front room, they will sit by me staring him out, then as he goes to leave, they will see him off

when i'm not there they are all over him.

dont know why, the amout of times i've acidently kicked into them, trod on them, shut them out,


but they always come back to me

[Fossy]

A dog is always pleased to see you when you come home at all hours - not so the wife.

[JudesNiceThings]

I wouldn't swap my cat Nellie for a dog - I know nothing about them, but have always considered them to be rather unintelligent by comparison!


(Runs for cover!)

[kengillam]

Cats more intelligent!! I've never seen a cat herding sheep yet