Clean Humor Thread

[tony41]

[sucadot]

The old, evil, bald king had three sons.
The youngest one shared his traits but the two older sons were not of an evil nature. In order to make sure the youngest one succeeded him, the king captured a fairy and promised it freedom in exchange for a wish.

"I wish for my youngest son to be my heir" said the king.

The son disappeared and the king was no longer bald.

[cambrensis]

The son disappeared and the king was no longer bald.

Ah, me! A case of heir today and gone tomorrow?

(With apologies to any sensitive souls reading this...)

[Mandart]

[artdecolover2]

I put a bet on a horse to come in at 10 to 1 – and it did! Unfortunately all the others came in at 12.30.

[cambrensis]

Marigolds? I must remember this for next St David's Day!

[Policequilts]

Marigolds, maybe, but I was thinking closer to FoxGlove.

[FalonTowers]

I’ve just been asked by a group of youngsters outside Tesco if I would get them 20 Richmonds, reluctantly I agreed and got them, I handed them over and you should have heard the aggressive abuse I got!

So I told them "next time get your own sausages”

[FalonTowers]

[Posbear]

An elderly gent was invited to his old friends' home for dinner one evening.
He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his with endearing terms-Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc.
The couple had been married almost 70 years, and clearly they were still very much in love.
While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over and said to his host, "I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names."
The old man hung his head. "I have to tell you the truth," he said, "I forgot her name about 10 years ago."